One of my best friends, who I have known forever, just had a baby. The other day, we were taking a walk, and while she pushed her adorable infant in the stroller she expressed her frustration with losing the post-partum weight. She immediately began putting herself down and commenting on how awful she looked. On how her stomach would never go back to the way it was before. That she felt fat and doughy. She also felt stressed about the balance of dieting to losing the weight, but making sure she was eating enough to continue breast feeding. I stopped her halfway through the conversation and told her how incredible she looks. That to me, she looks absolutely better than before she had the baby!
Whether you just had a baby, or not- why is it that as women we immediately go to the negative head space, and don’t congratulate ourselves on what we have DONE, instead of what we HAVE NOT? All she could see was the changes she didn’t like, not that she had just carried a baby for nine months, given birth, and was nurturing this child while only getting four hours of sleep a night.
Connection Between Stress and Our Self Reflection:
I started thinking about how as women we have so much on our plates. Managing the everyday balance between work, family, and still taking time to nurture our own souls. Stress and pressure can cause some warped reflections when we look in the mirror. The result of this is having a negative self-image, and only focusing on the things we don’t like about ourselves. Even writing this, it is easy for me to be reflective, but if I’m honest…I completely focus on the negative parts of myself too.
There is a lot to be said about having a tribe, a squad, a ride or die. No matter what you call it... these people can be special lights in our life when we are surrounded by nothing but our own darkness.
But not all of us are fortunate to have a person who builds us up when we feel small. Often, relationships between women can be toxic, superficial, and even competitive. I would guess that at some point we all have had a friend who puts us down to lessen their own insecurities. This is absolutely the worst kind of relationship, and in order to be the best version of ourselves we need to take a step back and ask ourselves if our friendships are healthy. So what can we do feel empowered and confident?
Ring in the Positivity:
It makes an incredible gift because your spouse will be able to cherish and remember your special gift forever. They also will be able to forever hold onto how confident and sexy you looked on that day. For better, or worse…even when you are wearing sweatpants and have bed head, they still think you look beautiful. Imagine, then, how incredible a photo book of you or a canvas print of you would be?
But… It's a Little out of my Comfort Zone...
Listen, most women don’t think they would be comfortable. But once the experience is happening you will be shocked at how empowered and confident you feel. The session includes:
Here is what one client said about her boudoir experience, “ "Obviously I struggle with self-image issues (as we all do), so that’s what started with me wanting to do boudoir. Especially with surgery having scars, I became really vulnerable about my scars. This has helped me see way past that and truly feel confident about myself.
The Boudoir Experience was INCREDIBLE! To me, it was about women empowerment. Self-love. Not only did you help me feel great that day, but you helped me through every single step. You are absolutely so humble and nice. You’re funny and genuine. You know exactly what to say. I questioned some of the poses in the moment... those ended up being some of my favorites! I honestly can’t imagine doing this with anyone else! Through my experience, I can help others. It’s a great feeling."
Feel incredibly beautiful and confident for your wedding and consider giving your spouse a gift they will never forget through bridal boudoir!
A Mother’s Job is Never Done:
Let’s face it, moms work really, really, really hard. I could probably add several more really’s to drive that point home. Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom- the work never ends.
While being a mother IS the greatest gift, we often don’t take the time to do things for ourselves, or practice self-care. Let’s change that this spring…Mother’s Day is just around the corner. It is May 9th to be exact. So, we have less than a month to figure out the perfect gift to give mom, or the perfect gift to tell our kids/spouse/significant other to give mom! Lol.
If You are the Mom:
How do you want your special day to be? What gifts have you gotten in the past that were big winners, and which gifts were maybe not so great? Like, the time my kids got me a paper shredder…yay, Happy Mother’s Day to me. Or the time I got coupons for free backrubs and to clean the bathrooms. Pretty sure there ended up being no back rubs, and a still dirty bathroom. On Mother’s Day you deserve to do something for yourself that allows you to rest, feel pampered, and recharged to continue to be the incredible mom you are!
If You are a Daughter or Son:
Think back to all the things your mother does to make sure you are living your best life. Being a mother, often requires us to be self-less and to put the needs of our children first. Sometimes, as mothers we can lose ourselves in the process. Doesn’t your mother deserve to relax and take time for herself? To feel like the strong, confident woman that she truly is?
If You are a Spouse or Partner:
No matter how old your spouse or partner is motherhood is emotionally, physically, and mentally draining. Whether your significant other just had a baby, and they are not quite feeling back to being themselves, or they had one twenty years ago…they deserve to feel beautiful and invigorated on their special day. Gifts should be personalized and unique, which is exactly what this gift will be.
Because Mother’s Day is a celebration of mothers! The boudoir experience involves, firstly, being pampered. Who doesn’t want a Mother’s Day Makeover??? You will experience a hair and makeup makeover and feel like a newer, sexier version of yourself. You will get to sit in a chair, listen to your favorite music…talk if you want to while being pampered, or just enjoy the peaceful time alone and take it all in. You can kick back and relax with a mimosa, or a beverage of your choosing. Not to mention you get to be styled and pick out sexy lingerie that fits your specific style and comfort level. Whether you want to look like old Hollywood glamor, or wear something more sporty or simply classic…the choice is yours. I am here to help you find your vision, and make you feel beautiful and at ease. Once you are comfortable, and glammed up I will shoot your boudoir session. Many women feel uncomfortable because they may not naturally know how to pose. Don’t let this deter you from experiencing a fantastic Mother’s Day! I will be in the hot seat showing you how to pose, and I promise you won’t feel silly or stupid.
Celebration of the Mom Bod:
Mothers are strong, fierce, beautiful women. Your body deserves to be celebrated. Whether you gave birth, adopted, or are a step-mother, whatever your situation is…your body has changed through time and the moments we experience as mothers. Celebrate those changes. We all have days where we feel not our best. We feel like we’ve gained weight, aged, lost elements of our youth… boudoir is an opportunity to take back that negativity, and feel empowered. It isn’t a magic pill, but boudoir will leave you feeling confidently fantastic. You will be relaxed, and remember this Mother’s Day forever.
Remembering and Cherishing the Experience:
So not only do you get relax, be styled and feel like a glamorous supermodel, but there are also options for those of you who want to remember and keep the experience forever. Following your personal viewing party, we will also discuss ordering options. There isn’t pressure to order, but for those who would like to continue the experience there are luxury albums, wall art, and many more gifts/memorabilia options to consider.
What Does the Experience Include, Again?
Here is the rundown to a fantastic Mother’s Day gift, it includes:
Moms, you deserve to be celebrated and have a day that is just meant for you. Boudoir celebrates the mom bod, and gives you the experience of feeling beautiful and empowered. Forget the flowers, breakfast in bed- boudoir is something unique, individualized, and you will never forget how it made you feel!
Back in 2010 Jessica Simpson had a documentary series on VH1 called “The Price of Beauty”. In this series, Simpson travelled to different countries around the globe to explore and define what beauty means to different people in various cultures. She did this through exploring different beauty and fashion trends, and the culture of beauty in each country. In some cultures being heavier was beautiful, in others it was having an elongated neck. One particular woman had burned her skin trying to lighten it to become her culture’s idea of “beauty”. We all want to feel beautiful, but at what cost? We shouldn’t be changing things to fit a certain model, instead change only what makes you feel better about you!
Often, youth is thought to be the big identifying factor of beauty. If we look at skincare lines, they are often marketed to bring back youthful skin. It often seems. as women, that we are constantly trying to get back to that fountain of youth. I fully admit to doing this as well. I analyze the way my face has changed, the lines that seem to have appeared overnight, the way my breasts are not as firm as they once were. But why is it that these physical changes typically have a negative connotation?
Youth is beautiful, but so is aging. Age is nothing but a number. In my experience of having the privilege to photograph so many beautiful women and from so many different walks of life, I have found that sometimes women feel they are too old to do boudoir. This, my friends, is exactly why you should do it!!! Boudoir is not just for the young twenty somethings (although they should do it too!), but for women from all walks and ages of life.
Experience and challenges make us who we are. There is beauty in documenting our visual stories and the way our bodies change over the years. Your body may not look exactly the way it did ten, fifteen, twenty, thirty years ago…but it isn’t supposed to. Fine lines, wrinkles, sunspots, c-section scars they tell the journey of our life story and there is beauty in that.
Ironically, the reason that Jessica Simpson decided to do this documentary was because, at the time, she had received a lot of negative press for gaining ten pounds. All of a sudden the media was tearing her apart and saying that she was extremely overweight. She decided to take control of the situation and use this series as an opportunity to gain confidence. The end result was her realizing that there is not one type of beautiful. What is most beautiful is a confident woman who makes her own choices and decides to embrace herself, with the imperfections that make her different from everyone else.
Boudoir is an opportunity to look at yourself in photographs and decide that you like what you see. To decide that you are your own kind of beautiful. Document your history, your story, and the powerfully beautiful woman that you are!
Sometimes it can be so easy to see why women get down on themselves. Social media and the entertainment industry, in general, can have the power to make women feel like they are never enough. That they are not thin enough, beautiful enough, strong enough… the result of this can be simply feeling like less than enough.
This is exactly why boudoir is so powerful. It has the capability to empower and transform how we as women feel about ourselves. The way I feel about certain body parts, has made me feel less than confident over the years. But that shouldn’t dimmish all of my other qualities. My hair, my eyes, my legs. Why is it that as women we always focus on what we are not instead of what we are?
Boudoir gives women the power to see the sexy, beautiful sides of themselves that they DO like. Boudoir isn’t about looking like a model, or like the “ideal” woman. It is saying I am badass the way I am and I am enough.
Whether it is simply for yourself, or a partner, take the opportunity to show off how amazing you are and that you are more than enough.
Is the idea of shopping for lingerie a little overwhelming? Or A LOT overwhelming? I get it, you look at the pictures online and think “There is no way that will look like that on me?”
No worries, I am here to help you every step of the way! If you shop for your shape, then you can say, “that looks even better on me, than the supermodel.”
When shopping for your shape, the most important rule is: Accentuate the Positive!
By identifying your body type ( which does not mean you are classifying your type by “less than perfect”) you can learn to focus on the parts of your body you love the most. I encourage this for every boudoir photography session, along with learning to be comfortable and confident in your own skin. The bonus of showing your shape with appropriately fitting lingerie will embrace your every curve and allow you to as well.
Identifying Your Body Type
Take a moment to undress and look into your mirror, making sure to have great posture.
This is not a time for you to be critical, but rather to look at your own anatomical geometry. Yes, I used the word “geometry”. It’s a series of measurements and angles that create a mere shape. Not the WRONG SHAPE, simply “A SHAPE”.
No matter what your weight is, a woman’s geometry will be classified as either:
The Truth Is……. Curves Never Go Out Of Style!
A P P L E
P E A R
Love your décolleté and waist and accentuate there. This will draw attention away from your bottom half to showcase your “little middle” and fabulous bust. Choose push-up bras, or a bustier to slender your waistline.
High Waisted Panties are ideal for you with a Bralette for the top! Play up that bottom half with hugging garter/sexy tights or stockings.
R E C T A N G L E
If you’re very straight you may wish to create the illusion of curves. Paying special attention to the busts and the legs, we can create gorgeous curves with a waist cincher underneath a lace body suit. A padded push up bra can also draw a lot more attention giving you a rounder, fuller appearance where you want it most.
H O U R G L A S S
This figure is very easy to work with when it comes to lingerie, and the key is to be form-fitting. Teddies and bodysuits do a good job of flattering the hourglass figure, especially fitted ones.
Wondering Where and What to Shop? See my Shoppable Inspiration Board
During the hustle and bustle of the holidays, it's pretty easy for us ladies to forget about ourselves. We get caught up in preparing for the upcoming holiday celebrations, not to mention shopping for all of our family and friends! I get it; we are all busy and have stuff to do! But I also believe that rewarding yourself with a little gift is not only fun but a wonderful and healthy outlet for all of us during these crazy times we live in. With all of that being said, I have decided to launch an amazing Black Friday Sale for you fantastic ladies out there! I want 2021 to be THE YEAR you love yourself, just as you are, with a boudoir experience that leaves you: empowered, feeling gorgeous (because YOU are!), and starts you on a self-love journey. Now through Nov. 27th, book your 2021 Boudoir Experience with Haute View Boudoir for a $99 deposit and receive a $99 print credit for FREE. Even better, you will lock in our 2020 Prices. Click here to view more info.
And as always, have a wonderful holiday season!
"Being a busy wife and Mom that works full time, I don’t have a whole lot of time to try new things. My 10 year wedding anniversary was coming up and I wanted to try something new and surprise my husband with something that he would never dream of!
I loved Everything about this experience! I felt so comfortable and beautiful the whole time. It was way more fun that what I had imagined it would be and Brittany did an amazing job capturing who I am and what my husband loves about my body! It was wonderful!"
"The session made me feel confident and comfortable despite my flaws. Time to love my forty- something self. My boudoir session was a surprise gift for my husband as we celebrate 25 years of marriage. It was time to pull out all the stops and knock his socks off!"
So much has changed in our world recently and shopping for your boudoir session has undergone a BIG change. With many stores not open and even more not allowing you to try on things, lingerie shopping is harder than ever! More women are moving online to places with fast delivery and easy returns like Amazon.
To help I have created this Shoppable Inspiration Board filled with What to Wear ideas and links to find the items or at least pointed in the right direction. And what's better than that? It's all affordable ideas, most are under $20.
Brittany is the camera, heart, and soul behind Haute View Boudoir in Chattanooga, TN. Her mission is to empower women to feel confident and beautiful in their own skin.